CASTING CALL – Professional Poop Coach (Paid) We're looking for a talented comedian, improviser, or content creator to play the role of a Professional Poop Coach during a live stream. This is a completely serious character in a completely ridiculous situation. The humor comes from staying in character at all times. Role Responsibilities: Coach a client through every stage of a bathroom break as if it's an elite athletic performance. Deliver professional feedback, motivation, and "technical corrections" with complete confidence. Analyze fake performance metrics, posture, breathing, efficiency, and recovery. Never acknowledge that the concept is absurd. Ideal Candidate: Strong improv skills. Excellent deadpan delivery. Comfortable on camera and interacting live. Able to commit to the bit for an extended period without breaking character. Examples of coaching: "Slow down. You're rushing the process." "Your breathing needs work." "That was a solid first attempt, but we can clean up the technique." "Champions aren't made overnight." Compensation: Paid. If you think you have what it takes to become the world's greatest Professional Poop Coach, send a short audition video staying fully in character and tell us why you're the right coach for the job.
